I admit, I am wondering if the naturist concept is creating an atmosphere of opportunity which swingers take advantage of that will ultimately forever justify the miss conception people have that naturism is tied to sex.
Personally, I don't care if people are swingers, gay, straight, married or not. I just don't want to be directly or inadvertently included in other people's private activities (in other words I don't even want to be asked if we're swingers which has happened once with our 3 little kids playing around us and kinda pissed me off). Its probably a matter of how people conduct themselves like everything else.
The core question is: Are swingers impacting naturism?
NOTE: For those who have seen my many posts I tend to be a centrist non-trouble maker type who wants to get along with everyone. So, I'm asking this not turn into a 'flame war' please.
15 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First)
ibthejury
Posted - 11/02/2009 : 14:36:32 Interesting topic. My wife and I are new to the naturist scene. My wife and I are both active and attractive. We were a little put off by assumptions made that naked means swingers. We enjoy each other and we enjoy being naked in a social environment. We do not enjoy swinging.
jds
Posted - 02/24/2009 : 19:07:05 Being a nudist is being natural and being a lifestyler is being natural for the way that you are wired sexually, so it both are very natural lifestyles. Enjoy and don't get hung up on labels cause not much separates all of us. socal
CathyandSteve
Posted - 02/24/2009 : 18:40:01 I don't consider myself a nudist, a naturist, a swinger or anything else. I like to go to resorts that allow me the option of sunbathing nude....period. I don't eat nude, I don't dance nude, I don't walk nude. I don't have sex with anyone but my husband.
We have been to both hedos, desires, braco, hidden beach resort, and CLub orient. We have been asked at every resort we have been to if we are a lifestyle couple. We politely say no. No explanation is needed. A lifestyle couple looking for other lifestyle couples will move on in their search....they won't watse time on us.
My mother knows we go to nude resorts...she assumes that we have sex with everybody. Sex and nudity go hand in hand in many peoples minds. I assure her we don't....I am not sure she believes me. In reality..I guess it doen't matter one way or the other. I don't hasve to justify what I do to anyone else and I know the truth.
It is what it is...period.
dannan
Posted - 02/23/2009 : 19:54:09
quote:Originally posted by Nautimicpl
I guess its about time for the Swinger perspective! LOL! We are.... and quite frankly if a couple is of interest and somewhat talk like swingers we have asked discreetly as it is difficult to sort it out at Club 0. For the cpl that was asked that in front of children...that was wrong if it was not done discreetly. There will always be people in different lifestyles that have no class but nothing you can do about it as "it is what it is"! We have learned the swingers tend to hang out near the Perch which is where we will hang out near. If we find a interesting couple I will discreetly ask "whats the rules" LOL! Its all about fun for us and if it leads to more by mutual interest thats a bonus, but just because we meet swingers does not mean we have sex with all of them!
my wife and i are not swingers, but always hang out around the perch bar. the reason being, we park at pedro's and must carry everything up the beach. we stop near the perch because of happy hour. i guess if you are a big drinking swinger you have found valhalla.
villa "Joie de Vie" - walk to orient, it's just a few steps from the villa.
RichardKenner
Posted - 02/23/2009 : 18:37:22
quote:Originally posted by Nautimicpl it is difficult to sort it out at Club 0.
To me, that's the fundamental problem. I think it should be very clear and unambiguous whether a place is or is not a place that swingers are likely to meet up. Being clear benefits both parties: you aren't going to waste time approaching people who aren't interested and those people will avoid possibly being offended.
Nautimicpl
Posted - 02/23/2009 : 18:25:50 I guess its about time for the Swinger perspective! LOL! We are.... and quite frankly if a couple is of interest and somewhat talk like swingers we have asked discreetly as it is difficult to sort it out at Club 0. For the cpl that was asked that in front of children...that was wrong if it was not done discreetly. There will always be people in different lifestyles that have no class but nothing you can do about it as "it is what it is"! We have learned the swingers tend to hang out near the Perch which is where we will hang out near. If we find a interesting couple I will discreetly ask "whats the rules" LOL! Its all about fun for us and if it leads to more by mutual interest thats a bonus, but just because we meet swingers does not mean we have sex with all of them!
zarnill
Posted - 02/23/2009 : 16:45:39
quote:We had a discussion this weekend with friends who've never been to a nude beach and had a 'perception' that most people frequenting nude beaches are 'swingers'. That word again, 'perception'! I'd really like to see that changed. Education is key!
Contessa
Yea I totally agree with this statement. If we did a 'root cause analysis' I think people would realize how silly bathing suits are. You could even apply six-sigma 5 Why analysis and root cause testing to see why people really want to wear bathing suits. But, that is a different thread so I don't want to de-rail the thread I started (but I would enjoy seeing that topic).
Doing a bit more thinking on the main topic. If a gay man comes up and hits on me I'd be totally offended because I wear a wedding band (not because hes gay)... If a women comes up and hits on me I'd be offended because I am wearing a wedding band... If a couple comes up its the same thing for me. Equal application of moral logic.
From what I am seeing on these posts, the guy that did ask with our three kids playing around us on a family beach (not Orient) showed horrible judgment. But that does not reflect on the entire swinger community.
I have a hard time understanding why its said swingers can't be naturists. Seems like saying Catholics can't be naturists. I don't understand the connection (I am a bit slow you know :) ).
I can see clearly the conerns of the clothesfreetv people who posted the article because if everyone who went to a naturist resort was subject to being asked if they were swingers would scare away new folks who tried naturism out and alienate many other folks. If you went to a restaurant and had other people come up and ask if they could have sex with your wife you would probably not go again. Then on the other side, I've not heard anyone say they have been approached many times either....
So is it that swingers can be naturists but should not ask the question at known family friendly locations? More thoughts are swirling on this topic in my head still. I'm trying to find a way to be kind to everyone while not being exposed to an environment I don't agree with. It almost seems like 'unspoken rules' would solve all the concerns.
BTW, very nice discussion. Have not heard any attacks yet.. :)
contessa
Posted - 02/23/2009 : 16:06:52 Dude & Marc, you're both correct. It's perception. We've been going to Orient for many years and have made the BEST friends, none of which are swingers. However, Orient does have it's share. We've been approached only 2 times in 23 yrs. and refused both times. I sure hope those 2 couples have met![;)] But, in all those years those are the only times we've been approached. I think there's a secret look or something!! [:D] Marc, I don't think swingers are more open-minded than anyone else, they're more open to their needs and wants. I think most of us, who frequent nude beaches, are open-minded or we wouldn't be there. We had a discussion this weekend with friends who've never been to a nude beach and had a 'perception' that most people frequenting nude beaches are 'swingers'. That word again, 'perception'! I'd really like to see that changed. Education is key!
[:D] Contessa
Life is Great... Pahty with Contessa!
MarcG
Posted - 02/23/2009 : 14:39:47 It's all a matter of perception. How can one if you are a swinger or nudist. Of course, swingers being much more open minded, i would imagine that the majority do frequent nude beaches and resorts. But it's all how you act in public on Orient Beach.
We once saw an older gentleman with a dozen early twenties girls walking nude at 2pm outside Club O beach. Got more stares and comments then swingers.
Public perception is the key, and some can not see the difference between sexuality and a nude beach/resort. It is what it is...
Jack
Posted - 02/23/2009 : 13:59:18 I have visited Calients several times in the last 3 mionths.....and have been visiting SXM for 34 years...and spend moch time on Orient. I find the patrons at both locations very respectful.
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I am on Island every month, 2 to 3 weeks Winter months. Enjoy..!!
rkitek
Posted - 02/23/2009 : 12:21:52 Perhaps swingers need a secret hand shake or wave.
zarnill
Posted - 02/23/2009 : 11:11:59 Integrating several people's comments and my personal feelings.
I too don't care what people do behind closed doors. I am glad swingers have a place to go too even though we are not swingers. However, at a nudist resort, I do not want to be approached and even asked if we are swingers (I don't think its appropriate at family naturist resorts). On the other hand at places like Hedo (never been there) I would guess its extremely appropriate to ask and people should expect to be asked.
Ledudas
Posted - 02/23/2009 : 08:53:22
quote:The problem, in my opinion, occurs when a venue, such as a naturist resort, tries to market itself as everything to everyone so that people who are there may not fully understand who everybody else is there. For example, if you advertise in a swinger's publication, it's reasonable for people going there to jump to the wrong conclusion that everybody there are swingers. This was the concern about Caliente, for example. But I only rarely see the problem as being the swingers themselves.
I assume you're referring to the Hedo type resorts here, and they do earn the reputation they have. It's very in your face at times, so we normally stay off in our own corner of the beach. I'm not sure how to keep from blurring the line in some minds between a swinger's type resort and a naturist resort like Club Orient. To some conservative folks (not talking politics, please!), going topless is a cardinal sin!!!!! But there is nothing you can do about ignorant folks who paint their biases with a broad brush!
We love both Club O and Hedo II for different reasons, but we're not swingers. When we are approached (and we have been at both places), a simple no has always sufficed. As long as there is respect for other guests, I don't care what folks do behind closed doors.
The Dude and Dudette
RichardKenner
Posted - 02/22/2009 : 21:37:46
quote:Originally posted by DSSS Nudists are a small percentage of the general population but swingers are probably an even smaller portion of the general population.
I'm not sure about that. I think there are far more swingers than nudists.
RichardKenner
Posted - 02/22/2009 : 21:35:20
quote:Originally posted by zarnill I don't know how this metric could be generated.
It can't. It's all nothing more than an educated guess.
quote:Since I am not a swinger I thought very few naturists are swingers because thats what I perceive.
I was talking about the proportion of swingers that are nudists vs. the proportion of the general population that are nudists. You're talking about the proportion of nudists that are swingers vs. the proportion of the general population that are swingers. They are different. But I think the same general statistics are also true: both numbers are small and they are fairly close, but the first is slightly larger.
I base these estimates on the general principle that people who are involved in one type of minority activity (nudism, swinging, the bdsm community, etc) will have a slightly higher probability than the general population of also being involved in a second such activity.
quote:I wonder if a poll here would give a general idea (certainly not scientific).
I think it's way too small a sample to be meaningful.
